YOUR MISSION, SHOULD YOU DECIDE TO ACCEPT IT:
KEEP YOUR TODDLER IN ONE SPOT FOR 3 HOURS.
Additional challenges: without causing crying, tantrums, or driving the person just in front of them crazy with seat-kicking.
Step 1: Plan for the Sit
Before you leave, pack lightweight toys your kid has never seen before. Consider a small movie player or video iPod as your secret back-up weapon. Know that if you use it, it will stop naps, but your kid may be too jazzed up to sleep anyway.
Step 2: Feed the Need: Mission Fuel
Pack many different snacks, maybe a sandwich or two for the parents as well. Don’t pack drinks – pick those up post-security checkpoint. (Sealed water may be OK, check with airline rules.)
Step 3: Target Acquired at Long Range
Dress your kid in bright red or orange. You’ll be able to spot them at a glance no matter where they are. Label them with their name, a parent’s cell phone number (who’s with the kid), or put a business card in their pocket.
Step 4: Afterburners Set on High
Run that kid out all over the place for twenty-thirty minutes before the flight. If possible, stow carry-on luggage with a travelling parent or locker beforehand. Try to run in less busy areas, instead of running through crowds jockeying to get on a plane. You may get some looks, but the kid is using up all the pent up energy beforehand, so when they do get into that seat, they’ll be ready for a rest. This works!
Step 5: Landing Site: To Seat or Not to Seat
Best choice: acquire a car seat with wheels on it for about $100-150. Roll through the whole airport, onto the plane, and off again into a rental car. Goes down the aisles, even. Advantage: Kid sleeps undisturbed during any portion of the trip (protect the sleep!!), is contained while awake, and can travel the whole route with minimal fuss. Disadvantage: the main seat strap went over the kid’s chest and arms, so it was a bit more work each car stop. Oh, and it was hard to raise their arms.
Standard Issue Car Seats: a pain to get through the airport. Try this: Let the kid run up to the gate (burn energy), and put the car seat on the stroller. (wheels are good!) Check the stroller at the gate.
Get an airplane seat, even for a kid under 2. Yes, it’s more money, but its safer in case the plane makes any fast movements. Kids 1+ year are contained without squirming in a parent’s arms. Easier to feed them, too, since they have their own tray. For kids under 6 months, look into a harness that will buckle to the parent’s belt.
Step 6: Mission Time Critical
Pick the shortest flight at the most convenient time. Flying 11am-3pm works well for us, especially with 2-3 hour flights. You still have to get to the airport by 10am, so you have to leave home 8:30-915am. But you’re not struggling to meet a 7am flight (which translates into no sleep for parents up late packing or up early to go). Expect to have no nap that day, due to the excitement, and call it a travel day. That evening, have food delivered or do room service, and call it an early night. Try to fly home the same time period.
Kids are happier in the AM, too. Fatigue at the end of the day affects their tolerance for new situations. Once we flew home with a sick, rashy kid on a 7pm flight. We had driven for an hour and a half to get to the airport, unexpectedly meeting traffic. The poor kid melted down right after the security check point. Luckily we were nursing, and the kid went to sleep soon after reaching the plane seat.
Some parents drive on long, 6 hour trips at night, leaving in the car right about bed time. Because of my experience above, I’ve been too scared to try it on a plane.
If you fly home in the afternoon (3 or 4pm), the kid may be ready to sit, but they’ve often missed their nap. Hotel check-out is around 11am, and we have a hard time settling into a nap during travel days. There’s just too much going on.
Directives from HQ:
Should any team member be caught trying to slip a filled sippie cup through security, foregoing the kid run-out before boarding, or trying to hold a squirming toddler lap-bound while balancing cranberry juice on the fold-down tray, the Secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions.
Good luck, reader.
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